Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Adoption Everywhere

It seems like every show I watch does an adoption story line (and I don't just watch soap operas). Nearly every week seems to bring another news story about adoption. (Those are the stories that just show up; not the stories that I go looking for.)

I don't know why. Am I just more sensitive to it? Is adoption just receiving more attention? I'm not sure.

But there are a number of examples of things that have been in my life for years (decades even!) that I am only now beginning to see adoption in. I'm sure in many cases that this is simply over-sensitivity.

And yet, I'm still struck by the themes that seem so relevant to adoption. Monday, as I was driving to my Search and Reunion support group, I heard a song I haven't heard in a long time. And I was struck by how much it resonated for me with adoption.

"Are We Ourselves" by The Fixx

Lost feelings return
So now maybe I can learn
To stop the world of a lie
This time around

Are we, are we, are we ourselves
Are we, are we, are we ourselves

Because seen through these eyes
We lead a double life
No one would know
So check it out
Stepping out
Here I go

Are we, are we, are we ourselves
Are we ourselves
And do we really know

Most spirit returns
Now maybe we learned
To stop this whirl of a lie
To this earth we are bound I ask you

Are we, are we, are we ourselves
Are we ourselves
And do we really know
Ooh do we know
Are we ourselves

When this song came out, it expressed for me something primal. I didn't know who I was. I wanted to know who I was. Lies and lost identity. I didn't connect it with adoption at the time, but that theme dominated so much of my life. And here it is in a song from my adolescence. A favorite song from that time. My mind knew, even if I didn't.

Lies and lost identity.

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